Nom de plume: Rivrdog

Search pattern

Spent almost 1.5 hours doing a simple search. 1.4 of those hours, I used a bad technique. There's a lesson here!

Lost item was a landline telephone handset. I have two on the upper floor, three downstairs and one in my Man Cave out in the Back Forty.

The search was precipitated by the landline ringing and NONE of the phones downstairs were handy. Found 2 of the 3 quickly (one in Da Wiff's chairside trashcan). I accounted for the 5 present phones, and tried to locate #6 electronically.

No joy.

Started a "work outward" search, convinced I was looking for a discharged phone which would not sound off when paged. Over an hour went by, with me turning over furniture, etc. I quit, wrote off the handset and prepared to console myself with an adult beverage, the very thought of which let me reflect more completely.

I thought to myself, "Self, why didn't you start with a PEOPLE search instead of an OBJECT search?

Gobsmacked.

The Person to be Searched was Da Wiff. I turned HER reclining chair over, and caught underneath it was the phone, dead battery and all.

The lesson? Search via the PEOPLE first!

POTUS shows his colors

On Wednesday, the pro-2A site, Bearing Arms, published an article detailing several parents of Roseburg shooting victims who had objected to President Obama's political blood-dancing for gun control immediately after the horrific crimes were committed.

Yesterday, as the parents/families of the victims were assembled at Roseburg High School to meet Obama for his supposedly-humanitarian trip to Roseburg, one parent was excluded. Note that he was one of the parents who had expressed his displeasure at Obama's blood-dancing.

Several observations:

• This puts the definite lie to Obama's claim that the trip was solely for humanitarian purposes, to "hug" the parents and family members of the victims. Even if Mr. Cooper had had an angry moment before, he should have been invited. He could have been privately frisked for weapons and accompanied by several Secret Service agents if there was any threat past verbal anger, but he should have been invited, not excluded.
• Obama can't stand the heat, and should stay the HELL out of the kitchen.
• Politically, Obama just lost ALL of the bona fides he might have built up for making the trip, and the National orgs which protect the 2A ALL need to follow my example and spread this news far and wide. NOW!

Anyone who still lacked an insight into Obama's character need look no farther than this display of discourteous cowardice.

Yes, COWARDICE.

Resign, Mister President. You are unfit to hold office for another minute.

Cross-posted from Straight_Case blog.

Thursday Thud

This ayem I awaken from indifferent dreams, pry open the crusty old eyes, reach for my tablet and open my email.

This is on top of the stack at the perspac addy:

Rivrdog.typepad.com Team,

I thought you might like to know some reasons why you are not getting enough Social Media and Organic search engine traffic for Rivrdog.typepad.com.

1. Your website Rivrdog.typepad.com is not ranking top in Google organic searches for many competitive keyword phrases.

2. Your company is not doing well in most of the Social Media Websites.

3. Your site is not user friendly on mobile devices.

There are many additional improvements that could be made to your website, and if you would like to learn about them, and are curious to know what our working together would involve, then I would be glad to provide you with a detailed analysis in the form of aWEBSITE AUDIT REPORT for FREE.

Our clients consistently tell us that their customers find them because they are at the top of the Google search rankings. Being at the top left of Google (#1- #3 organic positions) is the best thing you can do for your company's website traffic and online reputation. You will be happy to know that, my team is willing to guarantee you 1^st page Google ranking for most of your targetted keyword phrases in our six month ongoing campaign.

Sound interesting? Feel free to email us or alternatively you can provide me with your phone number and the best time to call you. I am also available to meet you in person and present you this website audit report.
------------------------------ ------------------------------ -----
Best Regards,
Name Redacted
Marketing Consultant

PS I: I am not spamming. I have studied your website and believe I can help with your business promotion. If you still want us to not contact you, you can ignore this email or ask to remove and I will not contact again.

PS II: I found your site using Google search and after having a look over your website I recommend you to implement future technologies such as HTML5 and Responsive Design to make your site more accessible in mobile phone, tablets, desktop etc.

I am immediately struck by the full force of a huge gravity-wave of ignorance coated with lies.

• This schmuck did NOT read my blog at all. Had he done so, he would have detected immediately that this is not a "company", just a collection of thought from an individual.
• This schmuck doesn't even know how to push the spell-checker button on his text editor.
• He never tried out Rivrdog on an Android device, it comes in just fine, and I have read it easily on a Windows Phone as well. I don't own the other brand which charges for shit I get for free on Droids.
• If he really had looked at my blog, he would have noted that it used to be hammered by as many as 2,000 pageviews/day, but then I quit posting gratuitous porn several years back, and lost about 3/4 of my readership. BTW, almost all that readership was from Islamic countries in the Middle East.
• If he had really, REALLY looked at the blog, he would have found the post I wrote several years ago addressing this exact subject, and noting that I was NOT going to turn the blog commercial, because the headhunters at the IRS were said to be compiling lists of those who did so, and bloggers might expect an unfriendly audit.
• As far as Social Media goes, I was probably using it before this schmuck was, and I noted that it did nothing for my numbers.

This blog has two over-arching goals, to teach and inform on issues of the day, and a secondary goal of allowing me to express my feelings on any subject. Expressing them now, you sir, are a schmuck, a liar and a boil on a pox on a pustule on the ass of the planet.

THAT is what we call a Thursday Thud. I might regret it, not having read the news of the day yet, but I am going to award this schmuck the Effinger of the Day, Dummy of the Week AND Maroon of the Month awards.

Fuck him and the horse he rode in on. 

 

Zipper Failure

...comes in several forms, such as a marriage-gone-stale temptation, and some (not much) sympathy can be found in those cases, locally exemplified by the County Executive's case.

When an on-duty cop has such a failure, and it's with a street whore, now that's an avalanche of STUPID. BTW, this cop was a Stater (detective), attached to the Tribal Gaming section. Hmmmm, something tells me the Oregon State Police needs to look over his entire case-load.

Yep, "following the wrong Captain" has ruined many a career and life. My father did his duty and warned me quite strongly about such stupidity.

Detective, YOU are Maroon of the Month!

Two sex boondoggles, today's Effinger

Hmmm....my traffic stats ought to go up with that title, "Sex Boondoggles"....

Oh! The Irony!

Just as my County is having a fit of "tut-tut" over the antics of the County Executive, who had an affair with a subordinate County leader, I get this via FacePlace.

Send a copy of that study to Commission Chairman Cogen. Since he admits to dipping his wick in the local pool, he's likely to have dipped it elsewhere.

Irony: This guy actually did a video on "Marriage Matters to Me" For this he gets the Effinger Award of the Day. I'm also awarding him the Dummy of the Week, and the Maroon of the Month awards. A rare Trifecta for you, Executive/Commissioner, Sir! Oh, I almost forgot, he's also a gun-grabber, but as a lowly Commish, he doesn't make the Illegal Mayors list. Is there an Illegal Councillor/Commish list he might be on?

Look quick, that vid might not be up long. Also, go to the linked poll and vote, even if you aren't from this County.

A GOP win? (D)emo defeat? WTF?

The GOPes are crowing that they beat the (D)onks on the Sequester. I have gotten two blast-mails from GOP-HQ already saying "we done good, give us mo' money!"

I don't think so, Festus. Any time you're on the battlefield, and the enemy makes a strong move, and you don't counter that move, but instead, roll with it, the best you can said to have done is survived the enemy's move. You can never be said to have won.

Re: this "sequester": Obama is applying a simple "poison-pill" strategy here, one that's very hard to beat. If the GOPes are going to beat it, they have to beat it by standing their ground, and making it look like HE is the one deliberately applying the hurt with the Sequester, which is true. They didn't stand their ground on the Air Traffic Controllers, they caved by modifying the Sequester so it's not an across-the-board system anymore, but has line-item control by the FAA (read: White House). That's not only NOT a win for the GOP, it's just handed some sort of line-item veto capability to the President which he did not have before, so it's really a major defeat.

The House just gave up their Article 1, Section 8 spending authority to some degree. Of course, once (and if) a budget deal is reached between Congress and the White House, you can count on Obama to start line-item vetoing whatever he wants, claiming that Congress gave him the authority to do so with this FAA sequester variance.

You NEVER give a bully what he wants, NEVER. He'll just take your offer, and punch you out anyway.

The GOP are my Maroons of the Month for this idiocy. They stood their ground on gun control, then decided it was okay to grab their ankles on a budget issue.

My pothead Congressman

Yep, you read it correctly: MY pothead Congressman. U.S. Rep Earl Blumenauer, (D) East Portland, just came all out (or was that all in?) for Federal MJ legalization. He gets Maroon of the Month for that.

Before all you Libertarians jump all over me, I'm coming around to the idea of legalizing weed by states, but not by the dot.gov. Simple, really. The government can't afford to be in the business of encouraging stoners, simply because unlike fine whisky drinkers like me, they are a motley lot.

Seriously, let's get real. NO Government has any business legalizing ANY sort of intoxicant until and unless it can detect and control intoxicated behavior where such behavior is legally and practically inappropriate. The Government can do that, more or less, with alcohol, but has NOT learned how to do it with weed. Hell, the Government can't even control intoxication by prescription drugs, which it DOES control at the front end, but does NOT control at the user end.

Now comes pot and it's millions of users.

Society is getting further and further behind the power curve on protecting itself from people doing complex, dangerous tasks while impaired by intoxication.

Earl Blumenauer wants to make it worse.

Oh, well, I'm represented by a pot puffer. It could be worse. I could be represented by an actual socialist.

Oh wait...

There's a reason to call them "Ass Press"

Two reasons, actually:

1. They are nincompoops. Utter crap flows from their newswire in a constant stream.
2. They have their lips pressed so far into the ass of the Socialists and their agenda item of Gun Control that they can't get the brown off.

Example, current, common, one each

The AssPress article asks the question, of whether Costas overstepped his position, in it's title. The answer is a simple "Yes". The article then goes on to issue a "well, no" answer and deliver a standard lefty excuse that Costas' departure from sports to delve into social engineering and Civil Rights Denial is okay because, well, because his ideas "will keep us safe". Except they won't keep us safe, that science is settled; denying the Bill of Rights is not only unpatriotic, it's treasonable; and just because, well, a sports blatherer is supposed to stick to sports. That's why they're there, isn't it?

When I want to see ass-kissing of the serious sort, I always turn to the Ass Press.

For Maroon of the Month, I give you Bob Costas. Wotta Maroon!

Bloomie steps over the line

NY Citeh Mayor Bloomberg was asked by the Brooklyn Borough President for National Guard help. Hizzoner refused to pass along the request because the Guard would have showed up in uniform and bearing arms, lending the appearance of a...wait for it...wait...a POLICE STATE!

Okay then, first the Marathon issue, now this. New Yorkers, could your city possibly be mismanaged worse than it is now?

I didn't think so.

Recall Bloomberg's incompetent, dictatorial ass, and DO.IT.NOW!

H/T to Say Uncle Blog

Dancing in the flood - Earl Blumenauer, whatta Maroon!

You've heard of Dancing in the Blood, of course, if you've read this blog for long. That particularly nasty terpsichore is done whenever there's some sort of mass-murder with firearms, and the anti-Civil Rights groups immediately use the event to try to further their un-Constitutional agenda to kill the Second Amendment to the Bill of Rights of the US Constitution. That's Dancing in the Blood.

The envirowhackos have their own version of this danse macabre, which I will call "dancing in the flood". The "science" behind the discredited theory of man-made global climate change has been discredited sixteen ways to Sunday, but the adherents of that strange religion remain unconvinced by the debunking of their phony "science". Not only do they remain unconvinced, they grab at straws in the wind, hence the Dancing in the Flood whenever a major adverse-weather event happens. Hurricane Sandy was just such a Weather event.

So it goes with our Greenie-Weenie, Earl "the Pearl" Blumenauer, Democrat representing the 3rd District of Oregon in Congress. He's just Danced in the Flood of Hurricane Sandy. He danced earlier this year in the big Heat Wave. The flood that time was in the tears of farmers and ranchers ruined by the drought, a continuing Weather event.

Earl, you dolt, there's Weather and there's Climate, and they are NOT the same, in fact, they share few connections in science. Climate is the continuing record of Weather events, and that's as close as it gets. Weather isn't even discussed in real Climate-science circles unless it's discussed as as a long, continuing record, the longer, the better, and it's specifically NEVER discussed in relation to a single Weather event.

Let this be a lesson to the Climate-scare Socialists* who have un-Constitutionally established their earth-religion as science-fact in US law: Weather is NOT Climate, never was, never can be.

But, these pearls of wisdom are lost on Earl, because, as my Momma done told me, you should never cast Pearls before Swine.

Representative Earl Blumenauer, (D) 3rd District, OR, you are the Maroon of the Month!

Your blogger may or may not be the Punster of the Month. You decide.

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* My forever challenge: the Climate-Scare religion is purely a function of Socialism. This blog challenges all readers to try to find proponents of that religion who are NOT Socialists.